Friday, August 05, 2005

My New Most Embarassing Moment

I attended a seminar earlier today. At first, I was hesitant to go as I was going alone but since the topics to be discussed were relevant to my work, I dragged my biik belly off the bed at 7 am to go to Dusit Hotel. I left the house at around 7:45 and was quite surprised when I reached Dusit at 8:30. (It usually takes me an hour and fifteen minutes to get to Makati.)

Since the seminar was at 9, and there were just 3 of us at the ballroom, I decided to have breakfast at the coffee shop. Since I didn't have the time, I decided to order a la carte instead of having the buffet. I ordered fluffy pancakes (I still don't understand how their chef defines "fluffy",) which was served with bacon (really awful, it was tough and it tasted like burnt slippers, not that I actually experienced having burned my slippers, much more tasting them) 2 slices of pineapple (that gave me the datung puti look) and 2 slices of melon (finally, something that can be classified as food!)

I passed by the comfort room to wash my hands, but to my horror, instead of water, the faucet gave me a sound similar to the rumblings of my biik belly when it is hungry.

Since I had some work to do, I sat at the corner of the room which was farthest from the podium. However, once the speakers started their lectures, I got so engrossed that I only got to work during the breaks. The male speakers were pretty good! The first one, who discussed the INCOTERMS 2000, was a movie-star looking french lawyer who so clearly discussed what could have been a confusing jumble of 3-letter initials (FAS, FOB, CFR, CIF, FOB, et cetera, et cetera). He spoke so slowly but since he explained the concepts so clearly, I was mesmerised (the way I get mesmerised to Christmas lights. He now probably thinks that I've got a crush on him.) The second speaker was a small, bald Irish banker, who talked fast and used his own pictures to illustrate how documents of credit worked. He was so hilariously funny that I found myself listening to his lecture on the ISBP for the Examination of Documents, which in actuality, is a sleeping pill disguised as a document.

The third speaker, a lady who holds a high position at the ICC International Court of Arbitration was obviously intelligent but was also utterly lacking in teaching skills. All throughout her lecture, I couldn't help but think that I could have given a better lecture on the advantages of arbitration over court litigation and how the ICC worked. She also made me focus my attentions on Dusit's version of a blueberry cheesecake which was better seen than eaten.

But I digress. The reason why I wanted to blog was to flush out all the embarassing tingles in my soft (with all the fat) cheeks. During lunch, I got to seat with several interesting people. We were chatting like old friends (which we all thought was more enjoyable than eating the overly-seasoned sea bass) when this old, dignified looking man took the seat to my right. My this-man-is-probably-important radar bleeped so I immediately tried to encourage him to join the discussion (which of course, turned from the more exciting ang-sarap-ng-barbecue-sa-Cebu to the more relevant I-hope-the-government-solves-the-deficit-neutral-situation-before-2010 as soon as he joined us.) After a while, I stupidly asked him, "I'm sorry, I don't think I got your name." And he answered, "Oh, I'm Sedfrey Ordonez." (And I just imagined myself drowning in that soggy mango crepe that Dusit served for dessert.) He then asked me my name and the firm that I represent. Naturally, I answered him with a smile (with my voice coming out from my nose.) He didn't have to say that he knew the founders of our firm, but of course, he did. I cannot believe that after all these years of memorizing his name (first, as the Solicitar General, next, as the Secretary of Justice, and finally, as the Permanent Representative of the Philippines to the United Nations), I will fail to recognize him!

After the seminar, I went back to the office and immediately described my stellarly stupid moment to our managing partner. He immediately agreed that this can pass as the new most embarassing moment of my life.